I am currently reading this essay turned book by Elle Luna. With her colourful illustrations, she challenges the reader to think about what they have in their life - a job ("something typically done from 9 to 5 for pay"), a career ("system of advancements and promotions where rewards are used to optimise behaviour") or a calling ("something we feel compelled to do regardless of fame or fortune"). I wouldn't do the book justice by describing it, so I'll share a passage where Elle writes about the difference between should and must.

“Should is how other people want us to live our lives.

It’s all of the expectations that others layer upon us. Sometimes, Shoulds are small, seemingly innocuous, and easily accommodated. “You should listen to that song,” for example. At other times, Shoulds are highly influential systems of thought that pressure and, at their most destructive, coerce us to live our lives differently.

When we choose Should, we’re choosing to live our life for someone or something other than ourselves. The journey to Should can be smooth, the rewards can seem clear, and the options are often plentiful.”

Elle on must:

“Must is different.

Must is who we are, what we believe, and what we do when we are alone with our truest, most authentic self. It’s that which calls to us most deeply. It’s our convictions, our passions, our deepest held urges and desires — unavoidable, undeniable, and inexplicable. Unlike Should, Must doesn’t accept compromises.

Must is when we stop conforming to other people’s ideals and start connecting to our own — and this allows us to cultivate our full potential as individuals. To choose Must is to say yes to hard work and constant effort, to say yes to a journey without a road map or guarantees, and in so doing, to say yes to what Joseph Campbell called “the experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonance within our innermost being and reality, so that we actually feel the rapture of being alive.”

Choosing Must is the greatest thing we can do with our lives.”

If you haven't read the essay that inspired it all, do yourself a favour, read it now (then go read the book!).